Let’s Talk About It!

OVERVIEW The first stage of transition is the personal exploration of your gender. We discuss what the process of exploring your gender feels like, how each of us figured it out in different ways, and what it’s like to be the partner of someone going through the gender exploration process. Sorry for the variable sound quality. We are still trying out different set ups to find something that works for us. SHOW NOTES Exposure to Read more

Whether you are in a relationship or have a close friend or family member that you rely on for support, prioritizing time with them is especially important if you are questioning your gender or transitioning. Any exploration or change in our gender identity and presentation is a big change that very much affects the people around us. Close relationships only remain close if we keep communicating to understand how each person is changing and growing Read more

OVERVIEW Transitioning is a slow, often frustrating, ongoing process. It can roughly be broken down into four phases: personal, social, medical, and legal. We discuss the general timeline of each phase and how they overlapped for Jake’s transition from female to male. At the end, Meaghan Ray shares what their transition has included so far. SHOW NOTES General Thoughts on Transitioning Typical FTM trans narrativeBinary transition from one to the otherMedical system sees it as Read more

Happy New Year! Though not specifically gender related, I thought I’d talk about my current goal setting process. This is something that has helped me maintain a sense of progress and control which is especially important during unpredictable fluctuations in my gender, frustrating stages of transition, or other stressful life events. Step 1: WHAT is your goal? During the second half of December and first half of January, I think about the different areas of Read more

OVERVIEW Language and labels are used to communicate our identities to others but for trans people, the first step of this process is finding language and labels to understand and define our own identities. There is a ton of language that is specific to the trans community and trans experiences and identities. As the partner of a trans person, finding this language can be helpful but also overwhelming. The social context and definitions of labels Read more

If you haven’t read it yet, check out Wearing a Binder: Physiological Effects. I will refer to the same areas of the body and some of those effects in this post. GENERAL RECOMMENDATIONS Try to wear it as short a time as possible. Most recommendations state no longer than 8 hours but if you work 8 or 10 or 12 hour days, that just isn’t possible. Just know that the longer you wear it, the Read more

Wearing a binder is sometimes the only way that a person with dysphoria related to having breasts can leave the house. The psychological and emotional impacts of dysphoria are often worse than the physical discomfort from the binder. But that doesn’t mean we should ignore the binder’s effects on our body. I strongly believe that the more you know about something, the more you can do to make it better. If you are someone who Read more

Coming out is not a one time thing. The closet metaphor may be accurate for how it feels with each instance but it is not a good metaphor for the lifelong process and constant decisions. Coming out is a matter of degrees. You can be completely open about your identity or experience or just hint at one part of it. You can also be out to a different extent to different people. Deciding how ‘out’ Read more

BATHROOMS ARE A BIG ISSUE The bathroom debate has gotten a lot of media attention lately. Should trans people be forced to use the bathroom that relates to their sex assigned at birth or be free to use the bathroom they are most comfortable with? I don’t want to go too much into the political debate but I can’t leave it be without making a couple key points: How exactly would this be enforced? With Read more

Trans Day of Remembrance is held on November 20th every year. It is a day to remember all the people locally, nationally, and internationally who have been killed by transphobic violence in the past year. The vast majority of people killed are trans women of colour. Memorial services are held where the names are read off and a moment of silence is observed for each. Trans Day of Remembrance is a hard day for me Read more